he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
buying booze in bulk is always a bad idea. i wish there was some direct deposit-like system
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
i just sent him like 8 different sexts and he texted me back about how good the hummus is that i left in his fridge.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
The fake number she gave me was for Pappa John's. Now I have a large pepperoni on the way.
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
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