you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
I can't find my pants or my car
I didn't even hookup I think I took them off at taco bell...
ha omg I always lose my dignity at taco bell as well... so no big deal.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
ENDLESS SCROLLING ON TUMBLR WAS MADE FOR HIGH PEOPLE!
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
That's what every 12 year old basketball team needs; a drunk and hungover lady eating KD whilst cheering them on. Highlight of their lives.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
Shoot me. Oh my god shoot me. My moms ex "likes assholes"
you made out with another girl for some wings
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
My fuck buddy just proposed... Correct me if I'm wrong, but doesn't that completely defeat the purpose of FRIENDS with benefits?
Now you can be friends with Insurance Benefits.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
Whatever douche. I sucked the dick that made you. I. Win.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
Randomize
