he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
then I woke up and felt a boner that wasn't even mine. never taking 3am vodka again
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
apparently there was a flour fight and couch sex...
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
TYLER OWES ME SO MUCH
I LET A CREEPY MAN I DONT KNOW SUCK ON MY NIPPLES
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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