He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
Correction, I've been on a lot of dates and a lot of dicks
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
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thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
She slept with 4 other guys since we went on a break. And her ex. But apparently she hasn't given any bjs out of respect for me. Why does that comfort me?!
I wasnt that drunk. Throwing the table off the third story was totally logical.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
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Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
its the pipe that keeps on giving. Just when I think it's done, I scrape just enough. It's a st. Patrick's day miracle!
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
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