We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
He was telling me how the song fireflies makes him feel like he can talk to animals
we do all of our sexting over chat on words with friends, so my boyfriend doesn't know about it when he looks at my texts.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
I knew I was in trouble when she kept referring to the next day as things we should do
So you brought her to my house and left her on my couch.
How did you get him out of the shower last time?
Order Taco Bell and leave a trail of burritos leading to his bed.
dude, where are you? this beer run has taken so long i read war and peace, took a nap, and shaved 3 times.
I was passed out in a bathroom stall. Of course im going to look like shit
Only the sound of Friends and my gulping of wine are masking the sounds of my roommate getting laid
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
I'm sorry that you wanted to get laid and I all I did was play with your new cat instead.
How I know I've been single too long: I'm reveling in finding out my taken friends are being tragically dumped
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Randomize
