I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
am i the only one who has tried sucking their own cock????
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
I tripped over a vacuum cleaner and fell into a beer pyramid
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
my roommates are pretty pissed at me. they sent me out for ice and i came back with a kitten.
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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