remember when you found twisted pleasure condoms in my parents bathroom? theyre gone.
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
I was talking to this girl who was in love with the air force. I was doing decently until I mentioned that the navy actually has more planes. Cockblocked by my knowledge of random trivia again.
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
21st Birthday Idea: liquor store gift registry. Give me a promotion.
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Eating this pizza pocket is like eating out god
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
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