Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
Our house smells like week old pizza, beer cans, cigarettes, and depressing career tracks....get lysol.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
I was also standing on my bed with a road cone pounding on the ceiling at 3am. Not sure why
Currently separating the burrito I just stuffed in my purse from the weed in my half smoken bowl that was already in it. My what the fuck moment beats yours.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
Now with the essential back story, I can empathize. Sorry about your beer and butthole.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
If a guy makes a dick joke within 24 hrs of matching am I just setting myself up for disaster if I say yes to a date lol
Randomize
