They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
"Friendship bread", "how to get period stains out of cement", and "elephant bereavement" are all in my recent google history. Whatever shit that was last night really did me in...
Today's goal is to get out of bed, before I take a shit. This might be hard
Pass or fail tho
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
If she gets mad at me, that only means more free time for me. I like to put myself I win win situations. Despite being in a relationship, I still find ways to accomplish my goals.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
Randomize
