she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
I told you it's awful. It looks like he was eating honey at a barbershop and tripped.
This adderall has me convinced I'm an Econ major.
These People Made Expensive Mistakes That They’ll Regret Forever
When we asked you how you got there you replied in all seriousness, "rode my legs"
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
Things The Opposite Sex Just Doesn’t Understand
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..