I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
i overslept, had to take a cab to the train station, might puke, bought the wrong flavored vitamin water, and mj's dead. what a terrible world to wake up to.
Why does lindsey know I was naked in the kitchen?
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
You know when its a good night when you have to be reminded IHOP is a family establishment.
You got my ass fired just for knowing you
thanks for the bacon
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I still can't believe he turned down that threesome with us in central park. He must be really committed.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Yeah just had sex and grub hub came right after he did. I’d say it’s a win.
How can i make it up 2 u?
DREW I AM SMOKING POT AND FUCKING. WE CANNOT DISCUSS THIS AT THIS PARTICULAR JUNCTURE.
Sextember may be over, but Cocktober is just beginning!!!
Randomize
