I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
I started making breakfast to subdue the hangover and last of the shrooms and only got as far as eating a half frozen pierogi out of a dixie cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
On my way to get pizza I followed a dog into Salvation Army where I was just hired
I'm pretty sure I imagined the dog... They still hired me
the bad thing about being great at twerking is that I'm powerless to stop myself from doing it when I'm drunk and in public.
Is it possible to be drunk burnt? Like sun burnt but from drinking? Cus I think I that's what it feels like
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
I s2g I’m about to get ghosted by a 34 yr old and my Oedipus complex cannot take it
Maybe the "i killed someone" and "tequila makes my clothes come off" comments freaked him out.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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