he wants to bone in the snuggie
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
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Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
Don't make fun of the drunk girl eating bread out of her pockets. I've been that girl.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
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I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
We were both too drunk to drive home. So we did it in the coat closet and then I walked home. 20/20 hindsight: Could have both walked to my apartment and then had sex there.
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success