moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Silently passing ghastly beer farts as I move around the bridal department at Tiffany's. Call it my contribution to the holiday spirit.
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He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
He said he wanted to see my room, not my womb. It's a common mistake.
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
These 21 People Shouldn’t Be Giving Dating Advice
An old man just slapped my ass and handed me five dollars while I was filling chips at subway. I feel violated, but that was the easiest five dollars I've ever made.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
Just got referred to as "the girl from Tuesday night" at the Taco Bell drive thru...what happened on my birthday?!
Today is going to be a great day. He just brought me a donut on his dick... It's Sticky Dick Donut Day!!!
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?