I just told my boyfriend I think I might be pregnant using Emoji icons....
which icon did you use to tell him he's not the father?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nothing kills the mood when I am hooking up on the dance floor like the DJ saying Happy Valentines.
I have the coolest burn here. Everyone is taking my picture. I'm like a celebrity of the burn victims.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
Annnnddddd this chick is using a hand puppet made of a sock to give her research presentation...
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found myself wondering why I WASN'T naked before, but I generally always know why I am naked. Except now. WHY THE FUCK ARE WE ALL NAKED
he won't tell me his last name, but I know his garage key code
There's nothing like a guy talking about your vagina as if it's delicious food to make your day better.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
How was it?
Incredible. Everyone in the world should be having the kind of sex I've been having.
He should write a pamphlet or something...
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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