Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
walking in back of a girl wearing booty shorts, a halter and a bracelet that says trainwreck. I don't get it. The first day of nice weather and all the whores come out, are they like hibernating bears or something?
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Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I found a sock full of anal beads in my dryer. At least she washes them.
We had to coat check the pizza.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
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I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I just asked my mom if I could be the drunk realitive at the reunion. She said as long as I'm not obvious.
Yeaaaaa...im super disgusted with myself lol...which is interesting, considering all of the things I have done in my life...
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
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