I cant believe I just managed to do a drug deal across the country for you...
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Do you deliver to the black dark pit where I am? I think it's called.... The toilet? Right next to hell...
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
How drunk was I last night?
You tried to unlock a door with your dick. That drunk.
Not the explanation for the cock bruise that I was looking for.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
I’m literally naked drinking a beer and I gotta leave in 6 minutes for work lol
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