Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
It's a delicate game of how much porn can I look at without the other interns noticing.
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Dude, my ex girlfriend showed up, bought me a tequila shot, made out with me and then disappeared into the night. Then her current girlfriend saw, so she came over and slapped me and then I made out with her too
This was before halftime
I RUINED A LESBIAN RELATIONSHIP BEFORE HALFTIME
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
you pulled out seven eyelashes and made me count them multiple times whilst crying hysterically.
he had a bulletproof vest and a pocket full of lollipops! how was i suppose to say no.
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