we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I'm soaked in beer, and I think blood. Why did we think we could tap a keg with a hammer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
So this guy is eyeing me from across the bar. Either the girl I hit on next to him is his girlfriend or he's her gay best friend. I should show him my Penis and find out.
Dude. Do it.
Definitely her date. But she saw it too. So now he used to be her date. Why can't this stuff Happen when I'm sober?
Well if you're drunk enough to make some mistakes this week I'd be down to redeem myself for my poor performance.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mom is selling her car. I'm secretly relieved I won't ever have to tell her about that time you puked in it
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
this potential sugar daddy just sent me a photo of him butt naked in the woods saying he wants to "grow our spirits together." so i think i found us a new drug dealer!
Block me from your phone tonight…I need to get laid tonight. But you've been being a douchebag. So not by you. But I might call you. So block me.
WHY WOULD I COCK BLOCK MYSELF???
I just walked in on her masturbating to a social anxiety video...
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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