Whatever it was. it was pregnant.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
he asked me if i "normally slept like that" because i was curled up in a ball facing the wall. then he told me that i woke up in the middle of the night and said "oh my god. i forgot you were here." how did he not understand that i didn't want him in my bed.
and he should realize what an amazing ex i am for encouraging my best friend to hook up with him
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
wait can you just like go into detail with this penis touching thing? like was it a hand job or was it like a day at the petting zoo or something
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
What the fuck i just wanna eat my froot loops and sext in peace. Y'all motherfuckers gotta be loud as shit and break my concentration
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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