the $50 fast cash from checking button should just be retitled "8th of weed"
you do realize eating doritos and gatorade as a breakfast hangover cure is only acceptable for one more month - then we have to grow up
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
Seriously though a big penis is like a puppy dog, or a sunny day or some other glorious thing
You are such a penis elitist
You were crying and singing wanted dead or alive while trying to eat cold soup, I think that pathetic is an understatement
Dammit now I'm pissed. Its like I am torn between two worlds. A world of girls, and a world of people punching other people in the head. Both are just so beautiful.
I saw it and almost just was like "Ice breaker: your penis is massive" but I didn't.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Shroomed with my best friend'a dad at his wife's surprise birthday party so you can say I have experience in the field
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
Intelligence report: the hot sister called you gross, the sweet sister says you're dumb, and the smart sister says all the other men she knows would have to die for her to hook up with you.
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