she uses ice cubes and hums anything I want. Last night was Welcome to the jungle. it wasnt lost on me shes a puma. no shame in that 30+ game.
I just put my retainer in and it tastes like weed
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
why is my new profile picture on Facebook one of me with a bunch of strangers on an elevator?
WTF YOU SHOULDNT BREAK A SWEAT TAKING A SHIT. MY BODY HATES ME.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
What do you want to swallow. Press 1 whiskey press 2 rum
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
He's drunk and I'm pain-killer high and we're about to watch fireworks at disney world. It's gonna be fucking magical
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
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