If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
Still trying to wash and scratch the glitter off of my dick. That stripper should be banned.
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
At least I can pee in a cup like a champ at this point
Um...It has come to my attention that I may have said some rather vulgar things about Sean Connery to you and anyone listening last night, so...I apologize for that. I meant the things I said. But still. Sorry.
I just took the kind of shit that makes your eyes well up with tears as you feel it moving inside of you... So cleansing.
As your only female friend, I feel the need to inform you that texts like these are why she dumped you.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
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