North Korea, Best Korea!
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
Ed hardy makes air fresheners now. Now even the air can be a douchebag.
Guess who's still drunk but on time to court to represent a DUI?
You are my hero
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
i just got hit on on the bus. Yes sir, because its every boys dream to fuck a forty year old with a face tattoo
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
It involves me, my best friend, and a stripper and her mother.
Randomize
