She told me to stay away from him cause apparently he fucks anything that walks. clearly i responded with..."i walk"
There is a keg full of gin. THERE SHOULD NEVER EVER BE A KEG FULL OF GIN.
No room in fridge, chilling wine in snow. Do NOT let the dog pee on it.
Hey on the reals though tomorrow if i take you out to lunch as just a friend will you also suck my cock as just a friend?
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I don't have any swimsuits that don't show off the weird handprint bruises on my hips. Do you have a onepiece I can borrow?
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
plus there's no nice way to tell a guy you physically hate the shape of their cock.
Side note. I love it when I think I've sobered up and then I get a second wind of drunk
It's Been clinically proven that people who have sex 6 or more times per week are happier than those who don't. Just and FYI. For your mental health. From a soon so be psychologist. Who is drunk.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
Randomize