That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
In my defense, last night's hookup turned out to be my actual girlfriend. That's gotta count for something, right?
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
Only in my life does a conversation about Hanukkah lead to sexting
Tequila Tuesday.. tonight is the night I defeat the liquor.
I have class at 8:30 and I am not bailing you out of the drunk tank again.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Randomize
