all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
Just found out you can rent the rollerena for 100 bucks and you can bring your own beer... when are you free this week?
she said shes getting her period tomorrow so she wants to have sex now. i didnt object. it would have been heartless.
ofcourse you didnt.
At least I tried to be smart when I brought the alarm clock into the bathroom just in case I fell asleep.
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
THEYRE FUCKING GOLD
Are you talking about the color of my tits or the quality of my nudes cause both are
Blow Jobs and the Patriots Playing I think I’m going to marry her
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
His nipple licking is glorious
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