dude you have to find out what a girl's name is before you sleep with her. if her name is debbie she's boring, if her name is lauren she's an overrated hoebag, if her name is meagan she gived bad head.
The problem is he wears abercrombie jeans like there's nothing wrong with it
Lots of alcohol. 3rd graders fuck me now.
Auto correct or actual 3rd graders?
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
you are going to have to live with the consequences, i'm going to fuck your sister
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Yeah... I still gave her a hug because I felt really bad though. I mentioned that my boyfriends grandma just died too, just to reinforce that I'm straight afterwards.
Nothing tops off the night like giving emotional and spiritual guidance to a 70 year old transvestite.
I know I'm moving in six days but getting wine drunk and laying in bed just sounds so good right now
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Hopefully he gets to dig deep into my body, before he digs deep into my past ..
sometimes i forget what nice tits i have and then i spend a month brushing my teeth naked in the front of the bathroom mirror, and i remember.
Randomize
