Jake died.
WTF????????? That's how you tell me????
Oops typo. Jake cried.
it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
no, no, no. omg. i said i wanted a SANDWICH! not a picture of your dick. damn cant you read? SANDWICH! now im blinded. great job.
i think i can safely say that is the weirdest thing you've ever propositioned me with. so obviously my answer is yes.
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Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
just had a memory of me telling homeless mark that it was the year of the bunny and he said "you da bunny, girl"
Found your dick twin last night
Can I color on your dick again?
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
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I started dipping tositos in my screwdriver last night
then apparently I went "not bad" and continued
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
If my drunken penis pic is ever to be forgiven id like to start over with all that
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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