where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
thanks...oh and i got my period
told you
oh hush
Your date looks like the Cloverfield monster. good luck.
i never knew gatorade would taste just as good on the way back up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how to cook rice: 1. put random amount of rice and water in a pot 2. have sex on the kitchen floor. when you are done having sex the rice is ready
i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
hes duct taped to the wall and we're throwing eggs at him. i love thirsty thursday.
If u ever apologize to me for "too-rough" sex again I will suspend ur all-access pass to my vagina indefinitely
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
Dude whoeverrs house this is has only creeam cheese and beer in the fridge. Thats my kinda diet
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