Did you see that girl I got with last night?
Girl? Oh...weird...to be honest Ive always thought you were gay..
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
I just reenacted what a cuntadactyl would act like by putting straws in my mouth as teeth and roaring, Plz come get me.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
how did i get to the car and why are my shoes broken
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
My dick is covered in produce stickers. I suspect you
You thought last year was bad... a guy dressed as a clown showed up with cocaine
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
I think I'd be more bothered by his cross dressing if I wasn't secretly into women..,
And that kids is the last time I ever try to outdrink Germans
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
she glued two packs of googly eyes on you while you were blacked out. We talked her out of using her hot glue gun.