Superbowl + Mdma, hope we're on the same page.
i just saw a man pushing two thirtys of beers in a stroller while his little kid ran to keep up. father of the year
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
These 33 Eskimo Brothers Boinked The Same Person And Couldn’t Be More Proud
i don't know what happened by from the looks of her lipstick I'd say she was skull fucked by a rhino
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
You were sitting on the filthy kitchen floor eating a packet of grated cheese, and you were crying because you couldn't find any cheese.. I'd say our party was a success.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I asked the subway guy how many cookies he thought I could smuggle into the bar. He said it looked like a 6 packer. he was correct
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
My cousin is passed out in my room, so I just masturbated in my walk-in closet. Apparently I get off on danger. Make note of that.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
The poop emoji wasn't even in my recents. Does that mean I'm growing up?