This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
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let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
OK am i seriously the only one who thinks Cocaine Tuesdays is a bad idea?
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
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How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
This stupid maranara sauce stain sucks. It keeps distracting me and it looks like I'm staring at my tits.
so I was eating out this girl who was wearing my pirate hat In an alley behind the bar last night and some girl walks up and takes a picture. apparently we had a crowd of about 10 and it turned her on so she just didn't tell me
I'm definitely not going to be able to fuck him high. I won't be able to not laugh at his man boobs
Oh goddamn. That a super downer Tuesday reality right there. Just hit me with the cold, hard, nasty facts.
So my family just woke up on Easter morning and shared a bowl. That's bonding😊