Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
My grandpa is talking about laundry and he asked if i could run a "small hot load." Wow. I had to leave the room.
jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
how do i say "thank you for the blowjob, but never talk to me again" without crushing her?
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
OK, the bar's closing. Do I go to home to my wife or my girlfriend?
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I've grown it out to 70s proportions. I'm calling it my chastity pelt.
I woke up on my girls floor with a pound of muenster cheese in my shirt pocket
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
The police report said i was screaming at someone that wasnt there, then the cops told me to call someone sober and i called mike to tell him "They are trying to arrest me for stealing information from the FBI" at that point they took me to jail.
Randomize
