do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
And if it was a miscarriage you should figure out whose it was. He must be an alphamale for his offspring to sustain life this long in the amusement park that is your body
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
Once he blows his load, he's more of an immediate flight risk than that jetBlue pilot. He's out the door before his cum is out of my vajayjay.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
so this maintenance guy stood at the corner of my cubical and scratched his balls for like a full minute cause he thought no one could see him
OH MY GOD MY UBER DRIVER IS PEEING BEHIND A DUMPSTER
Still got in the car though
I did put on a shirt to start the night, right?
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