he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
You don't have to be emotionally available for a blow job.
I just speedwalked down the broken metro escalator while high. Basically all my worst fears combined
he told me that my best friend was "one the most attractive people he's ever seen" and wondered why he didn't get a blow job
You defs just slept for 6 hours in a porta pottie. You should probably just kill yourself.
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I'm never waking up next to someone after sex again. It's alllll downhill from there.
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
Randomize