Omg. If Ina Garten Makes roast chicken one more time im going to strangle her with her white button down
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
ii just google-imaged 'sad turtle' and maggie gyllenhaal only came up once. what is the world coming to?
i feel like words won't express my appreciation properly so at some point i'm just going to bring you pizza then go down on you for an hour. fair?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've friend zoned this boy hard. I made him change my nipple rings before he went home.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
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