Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
Lucky for you, I found your phone.....Not so lucky for you, it was in the bottom of your vomit-filled trashcan.
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If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
I never kept track of who else he slept with. You think I have the time or the energy to keep track of every dick in my life?
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
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We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
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