David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
i think i just heard my dad finish in the other room...
True Life: I hate vaginal excretions
just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
I got written up at work for smelling like sex and vodka. Still not sure how they put that into professional terms.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
I need you to perform a face transplant. Please remove your face from your accounting book and relocate it to where it's most needed - between my legs.
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
