Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Your the only friend that would realize I'm gonna get drunk and send coke to me at a bar before I made drunken phone calls for it. You sir complete me.....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
Ice skating? Did you see me last night? I don't even know where my socks are
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm starting to think you fell asleep on your kitchen floor pantless with salsa spilt around you
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
You are hereby uninvited from future Turnt Tuesdays until further notice.
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
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