Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Omg you had literally better be on fire, drowning, and being crucified all at the same time to be calling me at 7:30 in the goddamn morning.
You had salsa out and brought a banana on a plate to bed
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
Standards are awful. It's like living in the zombie apocalypse. You can only have sex with certain people
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
My pubic hair is shaved into the shape of mistletoe.
I hope that's a joke and if not I need a snap of it
Things change once you put a ring on it. 5 years ago if I had morning wood she would have gone nympho on that. Now I am just lucky if she touches it rolling when we sleep.
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