Its not alright that i make out with a manican.
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
I'm getting very good at recycling my hook ups. So even though i'm having more sex... I'm the same amount of slutty.
Yes! I like to call that picking from the buffet!
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
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Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
So update from last night: I made friends with a coke dealer, I tore the card scanner off the wall of my dorm, and I passed out on our bathroom counter with my head in the sink.
I found him on the floor in the kitchen eating cheese and tomato. I mean a block of cheese and whole tomatoes, he was alternating. Thats why your cheese has teeth marks.
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Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
and if planning a fake elopement keeps me from fucking strangers and doing drugs, i think it's good for me
I'm stoned as hell watching the new Star Trek movie. My life is 110% better than it was an hour ago.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
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