i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Did you get your crutches off the street sign?
we can be functional adults and still think pizza lunchables are the shit
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I'm just waiting for the avalanche of beef.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Randomize