Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(262): View more from Wisconsin

I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.

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(262): I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day. http://tfl.nu/uzwr

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(931): View more from Tennessee

just woke up in my neighbors garage.

(931): View more from Tennessee

scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.

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(931): just woke up in my neighbors garage. (931): scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage. http://tfl.nu/x40j

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(312): View more from Illinois

I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.

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(312): I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix. http://tfl.nu/qngr

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(248): View more from Michigan

you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."

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(248): you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion." http://tfl.nu/tkud

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(419): View more from Ohio

You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?

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(419): You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text? http://tfl.nu/28br

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(717): View more from Pennsylvania

When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you

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(717): When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you http://tfl.nu/09i6

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(503): View more from Oregon

Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.

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(503): Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook. http://tfl.nu/p6bz

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(319): View more from Iowa

I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer.

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(319): I would ask why there is a chair tied to the door of the fridge.. but I am not sure anyone knows the answer. http://tfl.nu/5cv0

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(757): View more from Virginia

This theraflu would make for a great margarita.

(1-757): View more from Virginia

I can make a sudafedarita

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(757): This theraflu would make for a great margarita. (1-757): I can make a sudafedarita http://tfl.nu/10lx

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(847): View more from Illinois

My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.

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(847): My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan. http://tfl.nu/ww9p

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(979): View more from Texas

She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?

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(979): She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low? http://tfl.nu/2el8

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(660): View more from Missouri

I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!

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(660): I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification! http://tfl.nu/z1dt

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(231): View more from Michigan

I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.

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(231): I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it. http://tfl.nu/oche

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(307): View more from Wyoming

MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.

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(307): MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting. http://tfl.nu/3tf3

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(706): View more from Georgia

It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend...

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(706): It's not an office Christmas party until your boss confesses his undying love for your boyfriend... http://tfl.nu/nn4b

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