tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
the sad thing is, im pretty sure she was serious about giving me head for my falafel
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
Your tequila is gone. I suggest you bring more home before you go out for dinner. Money is taped to mailbox.
I don't even know why im sitting in this office eating a poptart.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
While all the other girls were trying to out skut the next, Cameron was just doing cartwheels around the bar. I think she's the only one who got laid.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
Agreed then we'll really be on our A game tomorrow. And by A I mean alcohol.
Pretty sure I used toilet water to wash vomit off my face last night...
They took the TVs out of the gym and the mini-Mart only had 2% milk. 2015 wants me to be fat
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
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