In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
phil was outside the bar last night, sitting on the ground playing songs on a guitar hero guitar to people walking by for money...best version of free bird ever
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
The UPD just told me that he was going to call the cops if i try to run. you owe me 5 dollars, i told u they arn't real cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
He also complimented my butt. High praise coming from a boob guy.
I'm glad there seems to be a general consensus regarding your ass
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I'm chasing my vodka with snickers.
I just want someone to put their head on my boobs and laugh at my jokes ....
The highlight of my night will be digging in other people's garbage
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
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