Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
not only did i manage to get kicked out of the bar, i also got kicked out of denny's. i didnt even know that was possible.
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He woke up, got my bottle of water and poured it on me and then went back to sleep. Not really how I want to wake up at 2 a.m.
Apparently as she was dragging me out of the club, I was clinching onto this european guy screaming at Jenna: that's the 12th time you've cockblocked me tonight
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Next time I take edibles I'm getting chipotle to cater the event
did u drive by my house last night?
bc if that wasn't you i threw my bourbon bottle at the wrong van
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
i just woke up, first off why is there pineapple everywhere and who's underwear is on my ceiling fan ?
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize