my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
I know its been a few months but you must know you hve the 2nd biggest dick I've ever seen. 1st place went to a rapper so don't feel bad.
I dont care if he cant spell. Illiterate people need blowjobs too
It was like a square peg in a round hole... I've never seen one shaped like a stick of butter...
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
I'm all dressed in my outfit from last night, and I'm not even the sluttiest person in Walmart right now. God bless Miami.
Please don't explain what tea bagging is to my mother.
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
I know you like got hit by a car but do you want to come to my birthday pardi
Why thank you for your unwanted opinion, person I've never met before.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
Think I was still drunk when I woke up cause I went and bought a mandolin
Randomize
