I'm drinking ghetto ass mojitos!
Wow. How can mojitos be ghetto?
Squirt + bacardi limon + limes = ghetto mojitos
Dude this girl just said she'd take me to pleasure town while giving me head
Will Ferrell is probably jerking himself off somewhere wishing he was you
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just came out of my room at 8 AM to find 2 pounds of raw hamburger and a half eaten cake strewn across the hallway. And I'm not surprised at all.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
You stole my crutches last night at the bar, the DJ had to ask for them to be returned
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm gonna give the beer pong table a viking pyre funeral at the bon fire.
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
You almost lost your european virginity to a Peruvian man waering a do-rag in a port-a-potty.
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
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