why does my vagina smell like weed?
omg thats a great idea
he just watched a baby story on tlc while high and just called me screaming he never wants me to get pregnant
then he said we can't have sex anymore because ill hate him.
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
I can't wait for paintbang. I'm going to throw a marker at a child. There will be bail money in my backpack in m trunk. Don't use it on beer.
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I slept with someone only because he got my Simon Birch impression. It was a new low.
spring break - time to see if my two week detoxing gave my liver a chance to recover.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
Never thought an ATM max withdrawal could be such a good thing...
I had a dream last night that I answered the phone and after I said hello, Shia Lebeouf started yelling "DO IT! JUST DO IT!" That's when I knew, I had officially become meme trash.
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
You texted me a picture of some random naked guy. Did you lose your virginity?
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