i just saw a foot job.
porn is incredible...
this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
I woke up with my 26er down my pants and a peice of paper stuck to my forehead with gum that said "tell it to the greek goddess beside me"
getting caught by my parents in bed with another guy was way easier coming out than telling them over dinner like I had planned.
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I know it sucks but it's just something that needs to be done though. Like shaving ur pubes or going to the dentist.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
Just follow the currents of life. And if they take me on to a guys dick, so be it.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
That same damn squirrel keeps staring at me like I did something wrong. Nature knows when you're hung over.
Randomize
