they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
I love Japanese schoolgirls with short skirts riding bikes on windy days.
You're never coming back, are you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
We bought home drug tests to see which of us could make it look more like a kaleidoscope. What happened to the days of innocent fun trying to best everyone with a breathalyzer?
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
I think I might be drunk enough to cut my own hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
i dont get why youre mad at me. i promised you he looked like jim morrison and you failed to ask me like which era
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
He's got a british accent, a tounge ring, and he's wearing an eye patch... Of corse I'm fucking him
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
Randomize